I’ve always been a believer of the two-way flow in any relationship, i.e.- adding value to the other person and receiving something in return. It always isn’t of the same kind or during the same time period, but it should happen at some point in the relationship. But can you estimate HOW much you are expected to return? I’ve been on the receiving end of quite a bit of help from people around me my entire life (as are all students, I guess). And more so, the past few rather stressful weeks. It has been emotional support, specialist support, material support.. Granted, all of it has been by family and friends who I trust and who hopefully trust me. But I still strongly feel the need to give back. And I’m not quite able to figure out how exactly to do so and how much is enough! Is “being there” for a friend who was “there” for you previously, good enough? Many times, you aren’t able to give back as soon as you would like to. It might even take a year! And how do you know if your sense of repaying the person for their help is not exactly what they had in mind?
Above all, how do you let that other person know you are grateful for their help without killing yourself with guilt because you aren’t able to add anything to them right now? Turns out, being on the receiving end of help is not the expected bed of roses for my conscience.
-A rather confusing post, I must say. But of what use is a blog if it doesn’t act as a pensieve for the author. Hopefully you understood my scattered thoughts. 🙂