I’ve been reading the 7 habits of highly effective people for the past few weeks. There is a very interesting concept called Win-Win or No Deal that Covey passionately argues for. The gist is that we should always go for win-win deals wherever possible and it is preferable to go for no deal if win-win is not possible. I totally bought into this concept, since I’m a big believer in the abundance mentality, i.e. there is enough for everyone and everyone can win. Also, win-lose or lose-win over extended periods of time can lead to a lot of suppressed frustration and anger. No deal is agreeing to disagree amicably and not make any sort of deal if it is not a win-win for both parties.
I was telling my friend about this concept when we were discussing what to do one evening. My vote was for the beach while his was for the movies. I said we should go for a win-win and ensure that both of us are happy or else go for a no deal. His remark was that a no deal would mean that we both did what we wanted but separately… which was a lose-lose for the both of us! This was a new and interesting insight to me.
In relationships, it can be a win-win.. but no deal usually sucks for both.